finding purpose

A few weeks ago, I had coffee down the road with a dear friend! I was super excited and it was quite a treat! I went all alone! I left feeling refreshed, even if the time was just a little while. As I sipped a cup of chocolatey and caramely coffee, she drank tea and we were able to catch up on life. As we chatted, I discovered I am not the only one who is wondering what my purpose is at this point in time!

This is such a strange time of life. In high school, I was looking toward college. In college, the goal was a career, marriage, children, and so on. Now, here I am, with a full time job guiding five little people looking to me for wisdom and instruction each day while I try to keep a grasp on who I am. These precious little people are a huge part of life and who I am and what I do, however, my job is to guide them to become independent and follow the Lord’s wonderful plan for their lives. When they grow up, leave home, excited to see where God will lead, it is vital moms still have a realization we still have life too, outside of being moms. After all, we were who we were before we had children. God had a plan then and it remains throughout young motherhood and beyond. What a tragedy it would be to say goodbye to the last child and have nothing left!

I hear many ladies trying to figure this mystery out. How do we spend so much time and energy with our precious children and remain who we are with all of our interests and abilities? I love every single minute being a mom. I am ready to drop at the end of everyday for sure, but I love it. I get sick of the bickering and would love to eat a meal without getting up 80 million times, but I love it. I would also love to take a shower without rushing to see what disaster happened during my two minutes and fifteen seconds of personal time. It can also seem lonely at times. This year has been especially weird, causing a sense of isolation for obvious reasons, so most people feel exceptionally alone! I have had way more time to sit with my thoughts this year than is healthy! Our typical trips to the library, gym classes, ice cream jaunts, and simply seeing people in our local Chick-fil-A has been halted this year! Social media can also play a role presenting pictures and stories of wild adventurous lives of those we know while we question why we have banana stuck to our shirts and the biggest event of the day was cleaning out the diaper pail with bleach spray.

So when I pack up the youngest child’s stuff and send them off into the world and my influence and watchful eyes are limited, what will life look like? It is only fair that these priceless people we raise get to go and live and experience God’s plan for them, so I get to let them go! I will miss the little boogers. As these ordinary yet wonderful days pass, how do I maintain myself? As I learn and grow, I will be asking some experienced ladies for their wisdom and and will get back to you. I have some idea, so I want to gather more insight from some experienced moms before together we look at practical ways to maintain a sense of balance among all the roles we play. In the meantime, God’s Word is an encouragement to me personally.

I keep the Lord in mind always.

Because He is at my right hand,

I will not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad

And my spirit rejoices;

My body also rests securely.

Psalm 16:8-9

You reveal the path of life to me;

In Your presence is abundant JOY.

Psalm 16:11

When I feel lonely, it’s that time that I can open the Bible and sit in God’s presence and literally be with Him. He is my dearest Friend Who never disappoints. Even when I am lonely, I can have JOY! I encourage you to make time for coffee with God. Whatever time works for you, schedule it. Sit at the kitchen table, make some coffee, open your Bible, and talk to Him. Set a timer if you need. I know you have stuff to do and people to take care of. We must prioritize our relationship with our heavenly Father if we are to maintain our life calling and guide our little people effectively. Spending a quiet calm morning with God before the sun rises has been a significant time for me and I would love to hear how this time goes for you! If you are an experienced mom who has lived this, I would love to hear from you as well. Please share what you found helpful and what you might do differently. I value your thoughts. As we travel this life together, He renews us day by day (2 Corinthians 4:16).

Love,

Charis