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ice cream while i wait

Hey! Whatcha doing? I have been to Chick-fil-A this morning for story time. I love hanging out there, and since we know the employees there, I love chatting with them. We occasionally, well, actually many times, also are offered free ice dreams, so that's of course a bonus! Yay for having toddlers - I get to partake in ice cream too!

I am also trying to keep up with everday stuff around home while trying to go through junk, clean out drawers, cabinets, and rooms, and pack up because we will hopefully be moving into our first home soon! I can hardly stand it! Mainly because we have a mold problem. Seven colonies of little mold friends, to be exact. Although we have lived in this house since we moved here two years ago, it's not until this summer that we discovered our mold issue. My sisters and momma came to stay for three weeks while my hubby went on a 23-day work sprint and was gone 17 of those days! I was so grateful for the company! However, they crawled on death's doorstep with swollen eyes, ear infections, coughs, lethargy, congestion, and a trip to urgent care. They seriously coughed and took Nyquil daily for three weeks! AHH! My dad suggested a mold kit, so we put our little petry dish out and collected our fuzzy friends and, according to the lab results, we have seven of them. Sick, I know!

So, yes, moving will be a dream! We have been praying and looking for a home since April. We actually thought we had a house back in the spring, had a sign in the yard for us, then, after checking on the house, we saw the sign was gone, cars were parked in the driveway, and someone's stuff was in the garage. Um...yeah...little upset about that! After the tough realization that dream was over, I realized God had clearly said a resounding no to that house and I also realized a little about myself.

At the beginning my prayers for that house were simply asking God for Him to work out the details for that particluar house. As the process continued, my prayers became more desparate, and to the point that house is what I wanted, no matter what, regardless of anything else. That's the one I wanted and that's the one I was going to get... Really, on the inside, it became my stomping my foot, crossing my arms, and pouting because I wanted what I wanted when i wanted it. Yep. Not happening. Thanks be to God, though, I mean, evidently that was not the best for our family, although I felt it was good enough. He may have been protecting us from some unknown trouble and I am glad that He shut that option down clearly instead of letting us (me) have my way and get into trouble.

We since have searched, prayed, researched, saved money (like, necessities only, folks - I am talking buying only groceries and diapers), and have found a great one we feel is blessed by the Lord. I can tell a difference in my prayers when I let God be in charge. When I am praying and feeling stressed because I want something so badly at any cost, I know deep down somewhere that it's probably not good for me. This time with this house, sure, I want it terribly and cannot wait to move, but it's not out of desparation at any cost. It seems God leads us in the best direction if we simply listen and are willing to follow Him. In the end, do we want anything else but His will and His best? If we can stop being toddlers for a second and think ahead to the futures, I believe we do want His best. Sometimes it requires waiting.

I am still waiting! Still waiting to leave this mold, this laundry room with a broken lightswitch and no light, the broken garage door, the cabinets beginning to separate from the wall, the floors that leave my girls' feet black from dirt I cannot mop out! I am praying for Him to work out the details and continue to be faithful as He has been so far. I think my job is to be faithful to Him as well.

Are you struggling with anything in your life today? Are you waiting for something? Evaluate your prayer attitude. Is it desparate for your will or desparate for His? Pretty tough sometimes, if I do say so. I totally get it! Sometimes we have to go with what we know in our head and let our feelings come later. I know that God has the best for me, so I am going to follow that, even when my feelings don't want that. I know that He makes me safe. I can sleep well knowing He is for me. We are on this road together, my dears! Have a great day!

I will lie down and sleep in peace, for You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety. Psalm 4:8



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